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PARENTS demand presents but want nothing. Your attempt to treat them to something different will be resented and reviled:
His driving experience
He was an avid Top Gear watcher and you’ve put up with years of him claiming Lando Norris is shit, so he should love this. Until discovering he now hates modern cars for not b...
REAL football is back, football for men from unfashionable towns who looked no further than 25 miles away for their key interest in life. What match will you be at?
Roy Hobbs, costermonger: “Great thing about Spennymoor vs Merthyr is you can be confident Trump won’t call the ref halfway through a game demanding a red card be rescinded...
WATER bills are going up, and consumers have every right to ask where their money is going. Let us break it down:
Executive bonuses
32p of every pound your bill increases by goes straight where it’s needed most – the offshore bank accounts of our executives and board members. They’ve worked harder than anyone to secure this bil...
HEATWAVE temperatures have made a woman become a single entity with her ‘pleather’ sofa.
After weeks of noticing her skin stick to her fake leather sofa, the latest bout of hot weather finally caused Joanna Kramer’s sweaty body to sink into its upholstery with no possibility of ever separating them.
Kramer, 32, said: “It was like falling in lov...
I TRIUMPHED in the Clacton by-election, therefore Count Binface must face the Parliamentary Standards Committee. Because that is democracy in action.
It is he, as the Clacton loser, who must answer questions about a £5m gift from a convicted fraudster. He who must explain why that same fraudster’s mother donated millions to Reform. He will face the gri...